Reflections

"We all have moments in our lives that bring us a sense of pride. We use these moments as building blocks of proof and we call upon them when we are in doubt and need a reaffirmation of our grit and determination. They provide us confidence in knowing just how tough we really are and allow us to push harder in the future. I rode into the aid station at approximately mile 85 in Gunlock, UT during the race this past weekend in sheer shock.  I was physically fatigued and bonking, more than likely from vomiting twice during the swim and once again shortly after getting on the bike.  I was mentally exhausted.  It was at this time that I nearly broke down because all I wanted to do was throw in the towel.  The SAG van had passed me twice already and it was full of people who had done just that.  The training I put in, the hours upon hours on the highways of Arizona, had my mind filled with goals of eclipsing my PR by 2+ hours, however due to the harsh conditions the realization that today was not going to be that day and this race was not going to be that race was setting in.  Between the 4-5 foot waves that decimated the race field in a matter of 2 hours (boats were plucking people out of the water five and six at a time) and the wind gusts up to 40 mph on the bike leaving me pedaling my ass off to go 9 mph at times, a transition of goals was taking place.  This race had become about survival.  It became more about finishing.  Armed with this new goal I got back on my bike and went to work.  I take pride in the moment when, rather than breaking down, I stood up, collected myself and said that St. George could take my PR goal but it was never going to break my will.  Some are calling Ironman St. George 2012 one of the most difficult IMs of all time; in fact, Ben Hoffman the race winner said that it was the toughest thing he’s ever done.  The once vivid images in my mind of the brutal swim and bike have already begun to fade and I don’t really remember the finish line, but I will always remember Gunlock, UT.  I am an Ironman St. George 2012 finisher."   

(Courtesy of my cousin, PK.  He shared his reflections on Tuesday via Facebook.)